What started out as an amusing email trickle has now become a junkmail deluge of various women wanting me to 'hook up' with them so I can give them a 'booty call' and become their 'fuck buddy'. Yes. This is an actual term. And it has nothing to do with Buddy Holly. RIP.
Various wannabe lovers have explained to me how their boyfriends have cheated on them and they want to film themselves getting 'a severe pounding' so they can send it to their love rat exes. Others have expressed a fascination with 'anal' and want a willing partner to experiment with. On this, I am assuming the ladies in question don't want to be both sponge and stone. To be fair, I didn't make any further inquiries, so I have no idea.
I can only conclude that one young lady is also into animal cruelty as she wanted me to soak her pet cat till it was dripping wet. Sodden cats are not sexy. They are sad. Fact.
Smut just isn't what it used to be and my junkmail box is now becoming a scary place to visit. However, I am free most Wednesdays...
PS. That last bit was a joke.
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