Monday, August 17, 2009

Sex Machine...

It's official. Women find me irresistible. I am eye candy...

After last week's bumper week of a woman chatting me up in a karaoke bar and another one giving me the wink in Pret A Manger I have now had a third woman giving me the eye.

This happened yesterday when I was outside in our front garden pruning our rose Steven. Steven is a very hardy rose and got his name as he's had all manner of mishaps but has still survived. Hence the nickname Steven as in Steven Seagal as in Steven Seagal of Hard To Kill fame.

Anyway, I was in the front garden pruning Steven and a very attractive jogger jogged past, slowed down, gave me a lovely smile then jogged on. So I did what any red-blooded man would do... I ran in the house scared and reported it to the Missus.
'It's happened again...'
'Another woman has given me the eye!'
'Outside... I was pruning Steven and I got a smile... from a jogger... a female jogger...'
'Do stop going on...'
'The sideburns have to go. They are making me irresistible to women. I'm a danger to myself...'
'What were you doing? Were you talking to yourself?'
'Where you singing to yourself?
'I might have been...'
'And did she say anything?'
'No... I was singing and I looked up and she sort of smiled...'
'Then she ran away?'
'It didn't happen like that...'
'But she ran away?'
'You think I'm care in the community, don't you?'
'Trust me... They'd never classify you as care in the community...'

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