Homeward Bound…

I am heading North at the end of March to finally meet my new niece.

I have booked the train so far in advance this time that I managed to buy a ticket without it costing me £150 and I’ll also be catching up with other family and friends while I’m there.

I explained to the Missus that I wanted to head up on my own so I could pretty much make my own itinerary and not have to worry about dragging her around various places like some kind of spare part.

It also obviously means I can go to whatever pubs I want whenever I want without worrying whether she’s having a fun time or not.

She was cool with this and, somewhat suspiciously, not totally unhappy to see the back of me for three days. But she did point out a flaw in the plan:

‘Your family will think I don’t like them.’
‘It’s fine. I’ll just tell them I want to come on my own as it makes it easier for me.’
‘They’ll probably assume I’m a posh southern girl who can’t be bothered with them…’
‘Well I don’t care what they think. I’ll set them straight. Anyway this is about me going home on my own so I can make my own plans without having to fret about you. It makes perfect sense to me.’
‘Well be warned. They’ll think something’s wrong…’

I forget her words and later that day I phone my mother to give her my dates and train times. I then inform her I’ll be coming on my own. There is a pause…

‘Is everything all right?’
‘Yes. Of course it is.’
‘Are you sure?’
‘Yes. Why?’
‘I mean. You’re coming home on your own…’
‘I just want to make the journey on my own so I can make my own itinerary and not have to worry about anyone else.’
‘Really?’
‘Yes!’
‘You would tell me if anything was wrong, wouldn’t you?’
‘Everything’s fine. We’re just not joined at the hip!’

There is another pause. My mother speaks again.

‘Well as long as you’re OK. I’ll see you when you arrive then… On your own…’

I may yet tell her I’m getting divorced. Just for the laugh value…