Hair Today...

I hate shaving and any form of facial hair maintainance is a real bind, but every once in a while I'll be tempted to sport facial hair of some description. Today is such a while...

Even worse I've recently seen a picture of Bertolt Brecht sporting a short moustache and have decided to have a go at wearing one of these. This plan has so far met with major resistance from the Missus and outright ridicule from the Boy but I am confident my new tactic can win them round.

So I head into the bathroom and shave but leave a moustache in place. It's not quite a 'Dirty Sanchez' but neither is it Hitler or a Mugabe. I tidy it up and head into the kitchen where the Missus is watching TV. I go into my speech:

'Now before you look at this and think it's ridiculous I want you think of it less as Facist dictator facial hair and more as left-wing poet-cum-playwright facial hair. Now, bearing that in mind, what do you think? I think it looks quite good...'

There is a look of disdain.
'On what planet do you think that looks good?'
'I think it gives me a certain air of intellectual dignity.'
'It makes you look like a kiddy-fiddler. Go shave it off. Now.'

I head to the bathroom dejected but a voice follows me out of the room.
'And in future never leave the house without first consulting me about your appearance.'

I'll win her round eventually I think as I get my razor out. Some day...