Myself and the missus are laid in bed on Saturday morning. I’d been watching a DVD of a martial arts series called Mind, Body And Kick-ass Moves the night before and she was quite taken with a Dim Mak expert who attacked people using pressure points.
‘I think I should learn martial arts.’ She suddenly announces.
‘You always reject the idea when I suggest it.’
‘Well not so much martial arts. Just the Dim Mak bit of it. I like the idea of just being able to touch someone and cause them pain.’
‘You just live with me and you cause me pain.’
‘Yes but you’re an idiot and you deserve it.’
‘I know some pressure points. Let me show you…’
‘Ouch! That bloody hurt!’
‘And there’s this one too…’
‘That’s not a pressure point. That’s just a bloody nip!’
‘But it was nipping a pressure point.’
‘You do that again and I’ll knock your head part off.’
‘But I’ll look like a Pez dispenser?’
‘It’ll be an improvement on an idiot…’ Pause. ‘Idiot!’
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