One of my oldest friends got married at the weekend so myself and the missus had a few days away at the posh country hotel where he and his now wife were tying the knot. It was a fantastic bash and the bride looked stunning, the groom and his ushers scrubbed up well and the speeches were genuinely funny. The missus, too, looked fantastic and it all went off like a dream.
It was very much a pool wedding as the married couple are essentially the Posh and Becks of the Surrey pool scene, although she’s prettier and much brighter and he’s genuinely funny and charming and doesn’t bonk PR girls (or any other girls for that matter) who then go on telly and masturbate pigs.
The comedy note of the day happened during the service when each of them had to say ‘I give you my ring and I also accept your ring...' Both started sniggering at the obvious double entendre here and the rest of the assembled throng soon joined in.
As my pool commitments are being wound down at present it was also a great chance to catch up with old faces from many years ago and we had a real blast. It was a day of continual laughing and drinking with a tremendous vibe.
The only sour note was the arrival of another wedding party at the hotel at about 4.30am who decided to get gobby with the groom. Cue the obligatory wedding punch-up, or so I thought, until the other lot suddenly realised they’d bitten off more than they could chew when several of our party started raring up and preparing to let them have it.
You could almost see the penny drop as they realised they’d picked a fight they couldn’t win and they promptly tried to drag away the two of their own group who had instigated the proceedings. Bless them, they then even asked for permission to walk past us to get to their rooms. From aggressors to cowed in about one minute. Brilliant…
It was also a stroke of luck, though, as I didn’t fancy phoning my missus and explaining that I was spending the night in a police cell with the groom’s family on assault charges.
But even that near-fracas showed a real positive from the weekend as there was a time an incident like that would have just gone off. Maybe – rude sniggering aside – we’ve all just grown up a little bit more now…
Anyway, my married friends certainly looked the part on Saturday. And not that they’ll need it, but good luck to them…
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